On learning to love myself- still. 
I’ve been blessed in the past few days with little pockets of solitude. And I’m in a state of mind to accept it as it is rather than wander around the house, cleaning things, spacing out, stepping briefly through the highlights of other people’s lives on Instagram. The pounding sensation in my head and in…
The Way You Are.
My God Does not sit upstairs door locked shaking their head at me or anyone else playing technicalities bingo on a yellowed scorecard Propped up on the back of a hymnal My God does not deny me the desires of my Heart; The sea of emotions that they’ve delicately woven into my soul are not…
2020
It is September. It is 2020. The air, as have all of us Has been light with hope Thick with despair Rapturous and untamed with wind and thunder and lighting that seems to have set the world on fire. And we are tired, we are frustrated, we are fed up. But we are also so…
Both things can be true
I’ve come to love the phrase Both things can be true; The innermost storms of me of all things can nestle quite peacefully within each other rather than boast about which can wreak the most havoc. And the gray becomes a familiar oasis, previously a scramble to tug this way or that to appease an…
Barbaric Yawp
When I was in high school, my particular brand of “having a hard time” manifested itself through an eating disorder that I developed after unintentionally losing a significant amount of weight when I began running on the school track and cross country teams. I became obsessive over not only the positive attention that I was…
The Wilderness
I have succumbed to The Wilderness And the discomfort, the Incredible depths of the experience: “I don’t know” And looking side to Side Wandering in the same direction In this collective Purgatory Where there should be Communion, The silence screeches. There is so much sun They say But I cannot feel it Over the empty…
Old Fear
Hello old fear I thought I had Rid myself of you Through positive imagery Stuffing down the Anxiety Old witchcraft Superstitions That held me hostage for so long. When good things happen When all is silent And there is finally peace I close my eyes And there you are It’s as if you can’t help…
Quarantine Memories
I listened to a song today That I hadn’t thought about in 11 years That’s about a third of My life And it made me a little teary eyed The same feelings tear at me That did the same All that time ago And I always wondered What will I be like at 25? 30?…
Photo Library
Moments frozen in time Taken in places I never imagined myself traveling A string of lights over a cobbled street An ancient river Or just a thank you sign noticed from hundreds of feet up. Shells of past lovers When we imagined that we Were happy And flattered ourselves with our own hope. Small appreciations,…
Paris
Taking shelter outside the cafe after walking the river Seine two days in a row/excited about the general smoke in the air and the fact that I won’t be chastised for smoking a cigarette/the streets not quite ancient but old enough for stories are patch-worked together by rivers, perfectly cubed rustic buildings/ thousand-year-old churches and…
Twenty Something
My twenty- something: If your hair runs rampant Through couch cushions Ring-ed White knuckled hands Like mine, Suffocates the sleeping imposter I am sure is lying beside You Leave it Let it run Let yourself run And I will not chase you I will However Watch you come back To the porch in my mind…
Connections
Intuitions combining Consciousness into the realms Of what may be tomorrow And ideas Polarities Founded, unfounded, Unwrapped, unraveled, Re-twisted Into girl-scout knots I find my belly Woman Firm in some places flexible in others and I am not reckless And now It does not define me Whether or not It is Or is not And…
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The Lightly Dark 